Great Training Day

Thought it might help all of you wannabes out there to get some insights into my excellent training methods. See, I'm not worried about you catching me, even if you do follow my plan, because that just won't happen. In addition to having an unnaturally high V02Max (genetics! What can I say?), I train harder, longer, and tougher than just about anyone you'll ever meet. If you can keep up with me, you deserve to beat me.

Today was a typical training day for me. I started out with a medium-long ride (95 miles) on my trusty tri bike. As I pulled out from my apartment into the bike lane I noticed a Mexican guy (I feel so bad for the less fortunate! That's why I always tip the delivery boy an extra dollar.) riding on a department store mountain bike. He wore a baseball cap under his bike helmet. He was only riding like 12 mph. I smoked that loser! And yes, I pushed him as I passed him, but I called out "On your left!" If you can't keep up with me, maybe you should consider whether you deserve to share the road with me. At about mile 50 I hit a section of tough hills. Now, I had been averaging 23 mph (just a tempo pace for me!) up until this point, but the annoying thing about hills is that they slow down even Lance Armstrong. Plus, yesterday I did a hard 15 mile run with hill repeats, so my legs were a little tired. But I reminded myself of my mantra as I ascended, saying to myself "I AM A WARRIOR! I AM A WARRIOR!" And this method totally worked. I shredded those hills. They were begging for mercy. "Please, Trigal! Go easy on us! What did we do to you?" But I had no mercy because I AM A WARRIOR. That's what it takes to win.

Did I mention how often I win things? Last week I came on second overall in a local sprint distance duathlon. It's just a duathlon, so it doesn't really count in terms of my USAT rankings, but it's still fun to cream the competition - show them what they have to fear (and they MUST fear me). I would have came in first place but I dropped my sunglasses on T1 so picking them up that slowed me down by a few seconds. In bigger races I usually win my age group. In addition, pretty much once a year I win the Employee of the Month award at my job. And last December I won the 5 Years of Excellent Services award at my job. Oh yeah, you DO fear me!

Can you ride 95 miles with hills? Can you go fast, and not in a pack which is cheating? If you can, let me know and maybe we can ride together. Think you can handle it?

FEAR ME!