Saturday, June 2, 2007

Secrets of Race Success Revealed

Before a big race I like to devote the entire preceding day to RACE FOCUS. This includes my special "patented" pre-race workout, a massage from Supersoulmate B. after a long hot tub and steam bath, and of course, consuming ideal pre-race foods.

First, for the pre-race workout. The key with exercise the day before a race is to really get the blood pumping into your muscles. I like to begin with a short 30 minute swim. After a 400 warm-up, with each 100 getting gradually faster, I do the following: 5x200 at threshold pace, 10x100 as hard as possible, with 30 seconds rest. This short swim will prime your lats.

To make transition as short as possible, I bring my trainer to the pool locker room and have my bike set up there. Luckily, at my gym there's not a lot of supervision in the locker room - just a bunch of Mexican maids cleaning toilets - so I can do another 45 minutes on the bike right inside the bathroom with no interruptions. I also like the steamy environment created by the locker room - really helps you be ready for anything in terms of heat in a race. On the trainer I ignore a warm-up because I'm already warm from swimming. So I blast right into a series that replicates my swim: 3x10 minutes at threshold pace, with 1 minute rest in between, then 5 x 5 minutes at max, 1 minute rest in between. Now for the run. To take care of my bike so that I can focus on my brick, Supersoulmate B. sneaks into the ladies room (in a trench coat and pumps he can totally pass for a middle aged lady!) to remove the Black Ninja and trainer. (He carries it out through a backdoor we discovered because we're pretty sure the gym manager would find my bathroom behavior to be some kind of liability).

Then I do an 8 mile run, running 6 miles at 5k pace, and an easy 2 mile cool down. Now I'm totally primed for my day. I'll go back to the gym in about an hour to enjoy a hot tub and sauna to really relax my muscles for tomorrow. Oh yeah, and the secret to race success is to really deprive yourself of fluids the day before. That way you're used to dehydration in the race. Good luck to all of you competing against me tomorrow! SUCKAHS!

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wow, I wish I could run 6 miles at 5k pace. That so totally rocks!

Anonymous said...

OK, I gotta admit, you were losing my attention. The whole premise was getting stale.... after all, a joke is only truly funny the first time you hear it, but you have redeemed yourself today. Funny stuff.

Billy said...

I think I'm falling in love with you.

Anonymous said...

You are certainly good at portraying the wrong image of what tri's and triathletes are about.

I think you're a beeyatch.