Karmaman

I traveled south today to participate in a flat, fast tri – my first local tri of the year. Fortunately, yesterday’s storms cleared up and it was a good day for racing. I got to the race with only 20 minutes to spare (effing traffic!) so I had to forsake my usual warm-up and simply briefly warm-up in the water. Man was it cold! Like the kind of cold that sucks the air from your lungs. That’s why pre-swimming was so important. On my warm-up swim I like to throw in a few butterfly strokes to intimidate the competition. Most triathletes don’t even know how to swim breast stroke, and my magnificent fly really scares the freaking carp out of any triathlete who’s the least bit intimidated by open water swimming.

Before the gun goes off I like to find the other fast swimmers and line up right behind them. It’s hard to know who will be a fast swimmer just by sight, and I’ve learned that you don’t always know by talking to people how they’ll do. Funny how other swimmers won’t disclose to you what time they swim 100 repeats on! I have learned to look at the goggles. Fast swimmers often wear Swedes. And they never wear face masks. One secret about me: I don't even wear goggles. They just drag you down.

Seems I found a good strong girl to draft off, but she really tried to shake me, zigging and zagging. I stayed on her toes and came out of the swim fresh but in good time. Running through transition to my rack I tripped and knocked over someone’s bike. Oops. I heard something pop but I picked myself up and kept booking towards my own bike. Eff it. My tire flatted once in transition. That’s karma! Sometimes your tire flats, sometimes you accidentally make someone else’s tire flat. I noticed it was a really nice titanium Lightspeed too – with that aero set-up the owner will be able to make up lost time pretty quickly.

I hammered the bike, which was nice and flat. I stayed in aero the entire time. In races shorter than a Half Ironman I don’t even bring fluids on the bike. I’m just not out there long enough to need nourishment, and anyway, fluids add extra weight. If you are as fast as I am, I suggest you copy this tip. You can always have a cup of water on the run (if you know how to pick it up and drink it without slowing down, like I do).

On the run I barely felt any of that typical “transition” feeling that comes after biking. This is because I work so much in my brick training, my legs are perfectly acclimated to running after biking. I wasn’t sure if I was the lead woman, but I certainly found lots of men to pass. I didn’t even look at my watch. I was flying. All of a sudden though, I noticed I wasn’t near anyone else. I know that there’s no way I could have beaten all of the men. Then I realized I had taken a wrong turn! Another perfect race ruined by a horrible race director and bad signage. I lost several minutes having to backtrack.

The race wasn’t a total disappointment. I came home with hardware. It turned out the owner of the Lightspeed was the girl who won the race last year. She had to drop out because she didn’t know how to fix a flat (so she claimed). I think she was too afraid to finish with a bad time. What a poor sport!